I Don't Care I’ll make this short and sweet. I don’t care. I don’t care that Britney Spears is having a melt down. CBS has the balls to say they’ll provide up to the minute coverage on the “crisis”. Hey morons, a crisis is the number of Iraqi civilians that have been killed, a crisis is the rapid declination of the dollar and the impending recession, a crisis is running out of batteries half way through trimming your pubes, not like that’s happened to me or anything… Crisis my ass, that bitch needs to let go of the limelight. I’m hoping she goes Anna Nicole Smith on me because I’m tired of looking at her beat up vagina, which if you look closely resembles Roger Ebert’s face: I give that pussy two thumbs down. I don’t care that Lindsey Lohan started drinking again. Good for her. I’ve been drinking religiously since the age of 17, it’s not like it made me bitter and impotent. I don’t care that [insert obligatory Paris Hilton story here]. I don’t care, I don’t care, I don’t fucking care. Society has always been voyeuristic to some extent, I guess it satisfies our intuitive need to pry at other people’s lives since many of us don’t have one. Maybe it’s just me but it seems that during the last decade there has been a universal dumbing down of every creative medium, especially television. I remember a time when MTV actually aired music, hence the name MUSIC Television. No I do not love New York, no I do not give a shit about your sweet 16, no I do not want to see you pimping any rides. I remember a time when CNN aired relevant news and was boring as hell. Obama wins Iowa yet they’re yapping about the Britney Spears “tragedy”. I remember a time when being smarter than a 5th grader didn’t mean you won a million dollars, it meant that you weren’t semi-retarded. I’d keep going but I have to go watch Tila Tequila.